I am sure this happens mostly with the first born. That moment when they are starting to toddle and they bump into something that makes them fall on their bum and start crying. It’s just so easy to pick her up and say “awww. come here baby, Mommy will fix it”.
There is nothing wrong in principle with doing this (unless you have back problems), but from my own experience, what happens is that baby quickly picks up on the fact that they just need to cry some real tears and they get picked up.
So you might thing that’s ok. But let me tell you, when you happen to be very pregnant with your second child and your 1 ½ year old toddler still wants to be picked up or she won’t stop crying, then it becomes a problem.
And that’s when I decided that I would use a different tactic. Every time Miss Z cried for any reason (a bump, a toy that didn’t do exactly what she wanted, whatever) I would go down to the floor and hold her there. Still lots of cuddles, but on the floor. After she was calm again and the crisis was over, then I’d pick her up.
That way there was no association between the crying and the picking up and I was never emotionally blackmailed again into picking her up.
I applied the same principle with Mr A and all went well. I am just starting to do the same with Miss A and so far so good.