I hired my first nanny when Miss Z was 9 months old. I went back to work when she was 12 months old. When I had Mr A (2 years later) I was on maternity leave for 9 months. People would often be surprised that I still had a nanny whilst I was on maternity leave.
I really loved my nanny, I trusted her, and the kids loved her. So I didn’t want to risk losing her. I don’t think it would be fair to say “well, can you go off and find another job and come back in 9 months’ time?”
So, if some people think it’s an over indulgence to have a nanny whilst you’re at home, I don’t agree. I was able to give the same attention to Mr A that I had given Miss Z for those first few months, and that was very important to me.
Similarly, when Miss A was on the way, I had no intention of letting go of my nanny. The other two are already in school (Miss Z full time and Mr A only mornings), but again, if I had to cope with 3 kids all by myself, Miss A wouldn’t have the same attention and I wouldn’t be able to take care of her and teach her to sleep and eat with the same care and dedication I gave the others.
As it happens, my nanny of almost 5 years is now a Mommy too, so I have a new nanny. And I am so happy that I found her. Yes, I would have been able to cope, but why choose a life of struggle if I can enjoy my kids and my time off?
I heard from a friend once that she felt guilty because she wanted to have a nanny. She is a stay-at-home Mom and has one child and planning the second, and she doesn’t feel she could cope taking care of two kids by herself. She felt guilty!! Guilty of what exactly? Guilty of being privileged enough to be able to afford a nanny? Guilty because some other friends of hers have to cope just by themselves?
I am pragmatic about this stuff. There are always people that are going to agree with you and people that will disagree. You need to live your life the way it works for you. Without guilty, without fear of looking bad. You live YOUR life. Let the others live theirs. And make no apologies for what you have. But if you can, do give something back 🙂